Wednesday, August 11, 2010
Silence and much needed Solitude
I sit here quietly, just me. Life has been buzzing around me, I realized at this moment that I'm dizzy from trying to keep up. I've been working hard at my kitchen cabinet makeover, put together the best birthday party I could for my grandmother and trying my best to figure out what to with my four year old who has suddenly been possessed by this other naughty boy that I don't know. I sat down to work on my blog, I've got dozens of blogs tucked away in my psyche waiting patiently for me to birth them into the world. I can tell something is off today, because as I sat down to write I felt blocked. Not blocked, in terms of writing...blocked emotionally. I figured I could fire off a blog written from my head but there seems to be a disconnect from my heart today. Maybe it's that I'm tired, maybe I haven't taken time to listen to myself lately. I decided that I would write this blog instead, written from heart and spirit.
It's only fair that I'm honest that some days, this simple abundance journey is hard. The important thing is that you take time to listen to yourself. After many years of practice, I can hear the gentle whisper of my spirit. There was a time when I could only hear it if it was whacked over my head like a ton of bricks. Finally, I have learned that if my mind, body and spirit have enough of being ignored it manifests in the form of anxiety or depression, all because I didn't listen. After time, I have learned to feel my spirit gently tapping me on the shoulder, today she says, rest.
I have chosen to turn my ringer off my home phone, shut my cell phone off, even close the magazines that I so adore. With a quiet afternoon to myself I am going to meditate quietly, nurture my spirit with silence and solitude for just a few hours. I have my candle burning beside me, I may treat myself with a delicious little snack and a soothing cup of tea. I may have a little cry if I need to and when I feel better I will have a refreshing bath and see where the rest of the day takes me.