Monday, December 21, 2009


illustration: Stephen Doyle

With the 2009 year coming to a close, I've been thinking about the past year, how fast it went. Wondering what did I learn this year, how did I grow, what do I now know? I decided to compile a "What I know for sure" list like Oprah does in her magazine. So here goes...

*Sometimes we can't make the "right" choice, we just have to make a choice and then make it feel right after.

*Just as people change and evolve, so do relationships, and that's okay.

*It's never too say I love You
to say I'm Sorry
to say I Forgive You
to say You Matter to Me

*Every one deserves forgiveness. Doing so will release you of the burden of carrying that grudge.

*The greatest gifts are those given with love and thoughtfulness.

*Your parents probably did the best job they could with what they knew at the time, parents are human beings and make mistakes...some bigger than others.

*As much as you swear you won't, you will probably be just like your mother in a lot of ways and actually it turns out that some of her "stuff" is not that bad.

*Make sure that at the beginning and end of each day you practice loving acts towards your partner and usually the stuff in between will be good too. If you let the first and/or last words you say to each other be sour ones, it sets a tone for the whole day.

* Children really just want your connection and presence. All I have to do is lie on the floor while my kids are playing and they think they hit the jackpot! Especially if you are a working mom like me, when you are there, try to plug in, its easy to get caught up in all the house stuff, but kids need it and crave your attention...even 10 solid minutes will do.

*It feels pretty good to be 30 years old, the twenties were a rocky road.

*It's the little things that matter...spontaneous hugs, family dinner time, eye contact, listening, baking cookies, being silly, slow dancing, family movie night, having coffee ready in the morning...

*A thorough clean can make all the difference in how your house looks. Wiping walls, baseboards, light switches, windows. Its actually one of the best home decor tips. My friend Sunshine has taught me this, see her blog for more Suddenly you can see your things, but not through a a shadow of dirt and dust.

*Touch will connect you to people. Give hugs to friends. When you speak to people touch their arm. I used to be a very anti-touchy person, but I realize what a difference it makes in your connection with people. I work with pre-adolescent children at my job, and it makes a HUGE difference in my relationship with them. When one of my 11 year old girls are crying from the depths of their soul because the latest boy broke her heart, it means everything to be hugged and have tears wiped away.

*Life goes by faster as you get older. Seasons will change faster than you can change your wreath on the door.

*The present moment is all there is.

*Daycare has not ruined my children like I believed would happen, my children have benefited from going to daycare, built relationships and have learned so much. It doesn't make me a bad mom to go to work. It makes me a better mom to have a life and to have relationships with other adults and have time outside of the four walls of our home.

*Listen to what the universe is trying to say to you, be open everyday to the possibility of inspiration, follow your bliss and use it to inspire others.

And that my friends, is what I know for sure.

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